Bandage A Broken Heart
by LittleShizukaChan
Summary: Yuki aches with his deep love for Toru. As his heart grows, it cracks and he steadily decends a spiral of madness and despair. And who better to bandage a broken heart than a doctor?YukixHatori. Rated for adult scenes and mild language.
1. How He Yearns

_No one else will ever accept you._

Yuki stared upward at the bleak ceiling painted grey by the stormy night and streaked with shadows of falling rain; a design as chaotic as the emotions raging through his locked up heart. How he longed only to take a lock of that sweet chocolate brown hair and run it through his fingers. To lace his arms around that slender form and draw her near so that she could know his love. He could feel his innards twisting into a knot of pain, anguish and nausea. Turning onto his side, Yuki curled into a tight ball while his shoulders shook with his effort to hold down a furious scream and keep his legs from taking him far away into the night forever. The blankets laying over him did little to soothe the chill that had coiled mercilessly around his spine and his bed felt like a slab of concrete which made his bones ache and his eyes water.

"Why? Why does it have to be this way?"

- - -

"Good morning, Yuki!" Tôru chirped merrily as the grey-haired prince came groggily into the kitchen, rubbing puffy sleep from his eyes.

Dressed in a white turtleneck, navy blue skirt and knee-length socks, Tôru was as always the vision of innocent adorability. The sight of her beaming smile and glittering eyes always aided to draw Yuki from the depths of his morning nature. Returning her radiant grin with a modest one of his own, he let his quiet voice fill in the silence that had stretched out in his moment of admiration for her.

"Good morning, Miss Honda. You've already made breakfast?" Yuki asked curiously, seeing that there was nothing on the stove and the aroma of food was fading fast from the air.

"Oh, yes, but I made some for you too, of course. It's just that Shigure was up much earlier than you, not that I'm saying it's a bad thing to sleep in or anything like that. It's just that he was really hungry so I had to make him something and then when Kyo came down and smelled the food, I actually heard his stomach growl so I had to make him some too. I didn't want to ask them to wait if they were really hungry and since I already had all of the cooking supplies out anyway, I went ahead and made you something too!"

Yuki's smile became warm as though he had sunken into a hot and steamy bath. How adorable she was and how thoroughly she explained herself as though she expected his heart to break if he had to wait a while for a meal. Lifting his hand, he shook his head.

"You are really too good to us, Miss Honda. I feel guilty for having you always do the cooking but I lack the skill to make anything more complex than-"

"-a glass of water. And you've been known to mess that up too." Shigure chimed in his lulling voice of swaying tones of humor.

Tôru laughed and looked over Yuki's shoulder to focus on the older man. Tall, kind-hearted and open-armed, especially with women, Shigure was always one to be counted on to make a sentimental moment into a joke.

"Your infinite praise is overwhelming, Shigure." Yuki spoke with a flatly sarcastic tone.

"Oh I know, I spoil you rotten by getting your hopes up like that." He laughed heartily before carrying his bowl over to the sink. Staring down at it as though it were something he'd never seen before, he mumbled, "I guess I'll just…wash this up then."

Blinking, Tôru let out a cry and hurried over, her hands on either side of her head as though it were about to burst in an array of beautiful confetti.

"Oh. No, Shigure! I couldn't ask you to do that! After all, it was me who made you breakfast and I served it so I'm the one who made the bowl dirty. You ate the food in it which was actually the first stage of cleaning so I should really be thanking you but I can take it from here!"

Smiling happily, Shigure handed over the dish and gave Yuki a sideways glance.

"If you were that eager to help out around the house, Yuki, this would really be a tight ship."

Both sets of eyes, dark and violet, widened in unison and shifted to focus on the girl standing before the sink. Sure enough, Tôru's head hung with defeat and her voice came out in a quivering sob.

"I knew it. I knew I didn't keep the house clean enough or have the meals ready in time…"

Fuming inside but too stunned to look it, Yuki felt his heart cracking along its delicate edges, throbbing hard and nearly making his face turn red. The ache cut deep whenever he saw this gentle spirit crushed in such a way. She was so unsure of herself, more readily believing in a jesting word of failure than any truthful compliment. He hated it. He wanted Tôru to see herself the way that he saw her: radiant, lovely, wondrous. He wanted to run Shigure into the ground, lift Tôru off of her feet and carry her away, leaving all of their worries behind. Instead, he stood there frozen and frowning, looking to their host then.

"Now look what you've done, Shigure." He spat in his quiet, vehement way which was all the more chilling than if he would simply yell.

Poking his fingers together with a well-faked innocence, Shigure spoke up with shame lacing his voice like too much whipped cream on top of pudding, "Oh Tôru, dear sweet Tôru. Alas I have spoken before thinking and I have upset you as I never meant to! This house has never been more amazing. Your presence here is a ray of sunshine in the gloom!"

"Save it for your pathetic books, Shigure." Yuki sighed, shaking his head.

"They're novels." He sang in response.

Tôru seemed to have relaxed with the little speech of reassurance and now looked to Shigure with that same beaming smile of unquestioning forgiveness.

"Thank you so much, Shigure. What a nice thing to say although I don't know if I make that big of an impact. I mean all I do is cook and clean and do laundry and make repairs and decorate on holidays and shop and-"

She was amazing. So beautiful and honest and completely unaware of her greatness, Tôru filled Yuki's eyes, occupied his mind and caressed the curves of his soul even if all she did was look at him with those gorgeous eyes. Swallowing a lump that was trying to form hard in his throat, he found himself imagining what she might look like beneath those cute garments of hers. How the contour of her hips would feel in his warm palms, how smooth the milky skin would be. How would she feel in the throws of passion she had never known? In his arms, he would make her feel invincible and maybe finally allow her to believe in everything that she was.

_It's impossible. The Zodiac Curse is crueler than it lets on at first. Don't you understand? Unless you love someone who is equally as damned as you are, you can never know the joys of fatherhood, never feel the compliance of a woman's body in a fit of love._

Those words that stung like needles behind his eyes in their utter finality swirled in his mind as he grew dizzy with desire just watching her speak to Shigure. He would never have her and it was slowly driving him to madness.

'What will I do?' He wondered in lifeless silence, his breaths coming a bit short, 'Tôru would not want a man who could not hold her or give her all that humans deserve.'

"Yuki?"

Breaking out of his trance, his thoughts snapping like brittle twigs, Yuki focused his blurry vision until he could see her face clearly.

"Yes, Miss Honda?"

"Would you like to go to the grocery store with me? I'd like to pick up a few things for our special dinner with Hatori and Momiji." Tôru said with a glitter in her eyes that betrayed her excited thoughts about the evening's private festivities with the two other Zodiac members.

"Yes, I'd love to." Yuki agreed happily.

'I love her so much.' He thought as he turned and left the kitchen, moving to the door to slip on his shoes and retrieve his coat, 'Even if we only ever go grocery shopping, at least she is here. As long as she is in my life, I'll find a way to go on.'

Tôru hurried over to him with grocery list in hand, pushing her feet into her shoes and tapping the toes against the floor to have them fit properly. Yuki could not wait to watch her cheeks redden with the cool Autumn breeze or her hair shine with the early morning glow of the sun and relishing in her company and proximity, he opened the door and the two of them headed off into the day together.


	2. House Call

Well I've got some time on my hands, why not update? –Insert hearty laugh-. Ok, everybody, this chapter is dedicated to the lovely Totoku who has given me my first review. _Sniffle_… Thanks.

- - -

"Waaahhh! Somebody, Kyo's hurting me and he smells really bad! Waaahhh!" Momiji sobbed aloud, his hat crunched into his head as Kyo's fist grinded it down.

Growling with renewed annoyance, Kyo shouted down into the younger boy's ear, "You try workin' your ass off all day long and then smellin' like a rose, you stupid rabbit!"

"Yourbackside is in perfect tact, Kyo. Leave the poor boy alone before you leave an indent in his pretty little head." Shigure mumbled over the rim of the steaming tea cup that Tôru had served him.

Turning to glare with his oddly shaded eyes of nearly-dried blood, Kyo almost hissed but managed to control the shreds of his dignity that remained and sat back in his own place at the table. Hatori and Momiji had arrived three hours early for dinner, apparently due to the fact that the golden haired youth couldnot stand to wait that duration of time to see Tôru. Dressed in a pink shirt which much resembled a dress that a four-year-old girl might wear, little yellow shorts and a white hat with a large yellow ribbon adorning it, he looked like the fairy of spring. Drying his eyes without a further care, he smiled brightly and bounced on his knees.

"Oh Tôru, I just can't wait to try your leek soup! Kisa said it was the most delicious leek soup she'd ever tasted! I just love leeks. Leeks are so good for you. Leeks can cure your cold!" Momiji chatted to the girl as she moved around the table, serving Yuki and Hatori their tea as well.

"Would you shut up about the damn leeks? I hate leeks!" Kyo fumed, smashing his fists down on the table out of a childish fit, using not the force they held which could snap the surface in two.

Tôru flinched at the sudden noise as dawning realization fell over her features and she let out a cry of alarm.

"Oh no! Kyo, I'm so sorry! I completely forgot that you hated leeks! It's just that Momiji said that was what he wanted and I got so excited that I guess I forgot to consider if everyone liked leeks! This is just awful! Don't worry, I'll make you something else! Anything you want, just tell me and I'll go and make it!" Tôru exclaimed in panic, hurrying around the table after giving Yuki his own cup of tea and running for the kitchen.

Violet eyes, focused and intent, stared down at the charming, hued reflection on the wavering surface of the beverage. Yuki could not bring himself to look upon his beloved Tôru, who had changed into a periwinkle blue dress since this morning for the sake of their company, wearing the yellow ribbons within her hair that were a gift from him on that special night so long ago. It was more than he found himself able to handle and he was glad for the heater resting over his lap as it did well to hide his excitement which still resisted its garment cage. He wanted to grab Kyo by his scrawny neck and smash his face into the table until it was sliced beyond recognition for all of the trouble he put Tôru through and he felt like a monster for such thoughts. Even if they were about that stupid cat.

"Uh… No, wait. You don't have to go making me anything special. I'll just eat the soup. Just relax, ok?" Kyo sighed out in his usual flat tone of defeat and self-pity.

"Um… Ok, if you're sure. I really don't mind, Kyo."

"Yeah, I'm sure, alright! Just si'down and… I don't know! Enjoy the company before you have to get dinner ready…"

With her panic-stricken face melting into a look of appreciation, Tôru returned to the table and took her seat next to Momiji with content smile. Shigure, on the other hand, looked troubled and leaned closer to the table to stare at Hatori who sat across from him.

"She puts him out like a candle, eh? Isn't it adorable how he responds to commands that way?" Shigure laughed with glee.

"Why you big-headed-"

"It's interesting that Kyo, the cat, is intelligent enough to learn to obey commands while you, the dog, are still too stupid to know when to keep your mouth closed." Hatori spoke with that resonating voice of deep lacking emotion.

Momiji burst into a fit of giggles while Tôru smiled nervously and monitored the insulted victim. Even Yuki loosed his light, glorious laughter which had been kept strictly bottled lately, Hatori giving him a sideways glance from his seatnext tohim. Kyo grinned with vicious triumph and glared to his right where Shigure was sitting with his head hung, obviously relishing in Hatori's momentary favoritism.

"You heard the man, Shigure. So just keep your mouth shut." Kyo growled confidently.

"And the same goes for you, Kyo. Yuki is ill and all of this commotion is not aiding his condition." The doctor intervened smoothly, still keeping his gaze fixated on the youth at his side.

All tension seemed to fade away as the concentrated point of attention fell onto Yuki's shoulders like bricks onto a flower. How dare he. How dare Hatori announce such a thing in front of everyone as though it did not even matter when he knew everyone would make a fuss. A muscle in Yuki's jaw twitched and he lowered his head. Tôru was the first to break the outstretching, uncomfortable silence.

"Yuki… You're sick? Why didn't you tell me? You should go to bed and rest and I'll bring you your dinner as soon as it's ready." She said, such tender concern in her quiet feminine voice.

Despite the humiliation at being declared ill, Yuki could not help but bask in the full attention of his beautiful goddess. Her eyes burning into the top of his skull made the hairs along the back of his neck stand up with alarm and pleasure and he felt his cheeks colour pink.

"I…" Yuki began, lifting his head to reveal his face alight with a fever of passion.

"Oh no, you have a fever Yuki." Momiji whined as he pointed past his escort to the prince.

"Yes Yuki. You certainly do look warmed up." Hatori said softly, setting down his untouched tea on the table and leaning back until he stood to his full, towering height,

"Why don't I take you up to your room and see if I can tell what the problem is?"

'What's he up to?' Yuki thought with a sudden needle of unease wedging deep into his core, 'What is he hiding? What is it he has to tell me in secret?'

Standing with reluctance, glad he had managed to calm his arousal, Yuki raised his hand to Tôru and gave her that same calming smile that he had displayed twice this morning. The first time when he had come down into the kitchen; the second when they were at the grocery store and she realized that he had not been able to eat his breakfast before they left, blaming herself. It seemed to comfort her less in this more serious situation but she relaxed in her seated position and nodded.

"Let Hatori take are of you, Yuki. I'll come up with your dinner. The leeks will help with whatever's making you sick."

"Yes, the leeks!" Momiji repeated with enthusiasm, much to Kyo's silent aggravation.

He wanted her. He wanted Tôru to come to his bed with him for it was love that sickened him now and he enjoyed it. It made his stomach twist and not and he almost laughed aloud but, as usual, schooled himself perfectly.

"If you insist, Miss Honda. I'm sorry that I ruined your evening." He spoke listlessly, following Hatori as the doctor began to lead the way to the stairs.

"Oh Yuki, don't apologize for getting sick. It isn't your fault." Tôru called after him, waving a bit before he disappeared into the hallway.

'No, it's your fault.' Yuki thought and dared to smile behind Hatori's back, his shoulders shaking for a moment. The adventure to Yuki's bedroom was otherwise uneventful until the door slid closed and the older man turned on him with such a stony glare that the teenager felt as though he'd been slapped across the face.

"Yuki." Hatori rumbled so low and yet so loudly it felt, "Why?"

Maintaining his demeanor, Yuki shook his head, his bangs swaying over his forehead and half-lidded eyes, "What are you talking about?"

"Why?"

'He knows…' Yuki thought with a screaming inner voice.

The two stood staring at each other in the darkness of the prince's room.

- - -

Ok, I really hope that you were able to understand the seating arrangement! I tried to put it as clearly as I could but in case you don't get it… Hatori and Yuki were seated side by side. To the right, an empty seat and Kyo. To the right, an empty seat and Shigure, meaning that Shigure would be sitting straight across from Hatori. To the right, Tôru and Momiji, meaning that Tôru would be sitting across from Kyo. I have no doubt that there's a mistake in the story somehow but… Oh well.

Oh, and another thing. Tôru is the Japanese spelling. I know most others use Tohru but…meh. I'm anti-conformist! Just like Sôma is instead of Sohma. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this next chapter and… Yeah, what a great spot to leave it off! Ahaha! Dude, I'm so evil. Reviews, please! Chapter dedications have begun.


	3. Unconventional Medicine

Aww, you guys rock the casbah. Thanks for all of the encouraging reviews. I just can't keep you guys in suspense so I'll get on with the show. This chapter is dedicated to hyper-writer14 for adding me to their favs list and to Kativa-Chan because, well, lets be honest people: There's no better way to show someone you love them then by…telling them you love them. So enjoy, you two! This one's especially for you.

- - -

"Look at me."

Hatori's voice was as deep a rumble as thunder on an ominous night. His eyes were as sharp and fierce as a blade. His composure was rigid and controlling. And yet all of these qualities were downplayed by the sophistication of his attire. A dress shirt, a vest, a tie. Tidy pants that he'd no doubt ironed earlier that very day. Shoes that clicked in a masculine way against the wooden floors, shining ebony and tied with the same measure of perfection as everything else was done with. Yuki stared hard into the chest of his foe for he could not bring himself to gaze upon the lacking symmetry that was the doctor's face.

"Look at me, Yuki."

A moment's hesitation was beaten down by the confidence instilled within Yuki by his martial arts teacher, the same man who had dared to teach the stupid cat and just about everyone else in the family who was familiar with the hobby. Those focused violet eyes rose until they settled upon the one queer marsh green orb left unhidden by the dark strands of hair. Hatori frowned somewhat, a gentle gesture that made the corners of his lips descend less than a fraction of existence but the impact was as strong as a snake bite.

"Have you not suffered enough, Yuki? Why must you be the inventor of your own sickeningly cruel doom? You have been given the greatest gift by having Tôru in your life as a friend and nothing more. Never anything more. Don't you understand that? It's impossible." He spoke quietly, his words so blunt and unfeeling.

"So you've said before." Yuki hissed in seething reply, his fingers twitching at his sides with the urge to ball into fists.

Staring down at the young one, Hatori seemed nothing more than a lifeless guardian of stone. Inside, however, he was a raging waterfall of concern. He had watched Yuki suffer throughout childhood, sometimes because of his doing in the matters of erasing memory. He had watched the change in this prosperous young man with the addition of Tôru in his life. But now he sought to destroy all of that strife and achievement with a foolish teenage lust. How unexpected for someone so promising.

Stepping forward, he saw Yuki tense and even heard a bone somewhere in his body click, "You will stop this nonsense or I will stop it for you. You know my capabilities."

An icy finger of panic stroked along Yuki's spine until he could feel his back arching as though to try and escape it. The idea of his love being smitten from his mind but the force of a stranger seemed barbaric, more so than any case he had considered before. He felt selfish but it could not be helped. Within himself, he could feel his soul wrapping chains around his love, refusing to release it for anything in the world.

"Don't be ridiculous. You can't do that to me!" Yuki's voice rose with bravado masking quaking terror.

"Keep your voice down. The last thing you want is to have Kyo holding you down as I erase your memories of 'love'." Hatori stated matter-of-factually, feeling ill in his heart for having to treat Yuki so coldly.

Despite his steely manner, Hatori had known once what Yuki realized now. True love, whatever stage of development it was at, was bliss. Sometimes he missed Kana so sorely that he would need medicine to aid his troubled sleep. He would be willing to take Yuki's memories not to hurt him but to save him. However, no such compassion showed upon his face, no matter how much he wished he could get it to shine there.

"How can you even suggest such a sick thing? You know better than perhaps any of the other Zodiac members how important it can be to find love in someone." Yuki accused as calmly as he could, weary of the previous threat.

"And how dangerous it can be to yearn for something you can never have. I had to learn that the hard way, Yuki. I don't want you to make the same mistake."

"I'm not making a mistake. Tôru knows my secret; our secret. She would never judge me for it. She would never turn her back on me."

"It sounds like you're trying to convince yourself as much as me. I know you realize that this union would work on a level of understanding but you would be cheating Tôru out of any hope for the kind of relationship humans need."

Yuki let out a shaky breath, his eyes widening only a moment before they fell to their usual calm composure and he leaned back against the wall. He had known that, of course, but to hear it spoken aloud was more painful than he anticipated. He could feel himself sinking, falling forever. All he saw were swirling wraiths of shadow and nausea. He blinked and when his eyes opened, he was laying on his back with a curious weight pressing down the surface on his left side.

"What…?" Yuki muttered, finding his tongue fat and sluggish in his mouth.

"Don't speak, Yuki. You'll strain yourself."

The prince groaned and turned his head, finding his sight set upon Hatori once more although his body did not flinch for he simply did not have the strength. He swallowed the dryness in his throat.

"What did you do to me?" He asked, more out of curiosity than actual anger.

Turning away from the medical bag he seemed to be rummaging through, Hatori set that chilled gaze upon him but it felt looser than it had when its intense grip had wrung the life out of Yuki's soul.

"Not a thing. You upset yourself into fainting. I put you in your bed and had dinner downstairs."

The initial emptiness of the mind when first awoken faded and Yuki bolted upright with a force of adrenaline. Sitting up straight, he shook his head.

"The dinner! Miss Honda must be so concerned. I must tell her that-"

"She's asleep." The doctor interrupted, annoyed that his patient was not following orders, "She and Kyo escorted Momiji home and returned with my bag. I gave you something to help you sleep when you began to thrash and they called it a night after that."

His pale hands curled into fists, wrinkling the blanket in their strangle hold. What a fool he was. How could he have gotten himself into such a position? He did not doubt that Tôru was not asleep at all but in fact fretting alone in her room that the ordeal was somehow impossibly her fault. Ripping back the blanket, he twisted his legs and set his feet upon the floor. Hatori's hand fell down onto his shoulder with such a forbidding touch that he could barely breathe a moment.

"Let me go, Hatori."

"You're unwell, Yuki. You really have given yourself a fever with all of this foolishness." Hatori retorted, a hint of emotion in his voice obscured and incomprehensible in his flat tone.

"I have to see if she's alright!"

The world spun. The squabble lasted seconds at best before the bed and Yuki's back snuggled together once more and his body was crushed into its welcoming softness. The weight of a thousand worries lay atop him and when his vision focused from the blur of eternity, Yuki stared up into the gentle face of Hatori, eyes wrinkled at the corners as tears welled in their lower rims. With his hair pushed aside in the fuss, his face was all the more becoming. Yuki exhaled before cool and yet sweetly plush lips pressed against his own, dry and speechless.

'He's kissing me…'

- - -

Ahahaha! The power of cliffhanger endings. What will Yuki's reaction be! Will be submit to the sexy doctor or will he be defiant and turn himself into a victim of passion! …I don't know yet, I'm sort of working it out as I go.

Yuki: …I'm not gay!

Oh shut up. See you next chapter everybody! More reviews, more reviews!

Yuki: For your witch's brew…

What!


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